yadayadayada...kill,kill,kill...threat,threat,threat...

for some obvious reason i desperately needed a diary of any kind..except for the pink colour ones and the kind that says 'diary' in a funky-girly kind of way...they're just soo....eeergh...*spine tingles*..oh well...I'll get that diary if i have time to go out...now about the title...i just wrote that since there's no non-stupid and unlame title that i could think of...and i don't even think that you readers have an idea either am i right?? well...what to talk about...well...i spend the rest of this freakin boring day (as usual) playing Gemrey ( my retarded-one-string-missing-guitar) and i composed a song of my own...it's kinda simple...well..i know it wont hit the radio or anything like duh! i tried to find something else to do today but there was nothing in particular that i could do...oh did i mentioned that Laddy (my all-time-favourite basketball ball) was stolen from my grandma's house a few days earlier??? i guess i didn't...what's the big deal about it? well i spend 70 ringgit to buy that freakin ball for basketball practice...to make matters worst and more precise...IT WAS ALL MY MONEY DAGNAMIT!! see i have this thing with me that always tells me to use my own money to buy my own things...well..it was a really good idea since you wont be too worried about our parent using their money to buy things and make them start a lecture about saving-is-better-than-spending-on-something-that-is-useless(to them)...and trust me..you wont want to get you parents to start up that lecture 'cause that lecture can be agonizingly,torturingly,absolutely and literally LONG...you'll die half-way through the lecture...i was going to talk about something but the topic is lost in my giant imaginative mind...soo i guess I'll be updating some other time when that topic that i was thinking of comes back...

my life full off suffering and hate??? it's true enough...

hola amigos...well...i have nothing much to say this time...but i think this post would be long enough...whatever you guys think after reading this...well...holiday is ending in 2 weeks...i don't want it to end but i want it to end at the same time...this holiday just makes me think of my life...i realized its full of suffering and hate...I've been hating myself and other things i cant tell you about...and I've been suffering as long as i could remember from the starting of this year...i tried everything i can to change it...but it never happened...it didn't change even for one bit...it's as if I'm already meant to hate a miserable and unhappy life...i accept that...but it pist me off sometimes...even though that, i knew the fact that i couldn't do anything about it...since its god's willing that i have a life like this...sometimes i wanted to just...die...but i love my life too much to give it up just like that...i wanted to be special...i wanted to be different from any mortal of this world...i know I'm not that perfectly nice person...i lied before...and i did some other bad things in my life...because of those things i did....my life turned out like this...i don't care...i deserve it...i wasn't qualified enough to deserve happiness...nor do i deserve my dreams to come true...i only wanted one wish in my mind to come true...just that one wish that i know would change everything in my mortal and short life...i would like to tell you what it is...but...i just cant...i just have to keep it inside...that wish is really important to me...even though that wish would have big consequences...and bad consequences...i just want it...I'll be more than happy if it came true...and I'll wait for it if i have too...even if it takes me years of waiting...no matter what i won't let it go...

indian dancing and spongebob...

hola amigos, i have to ask you something...or atleast tell you...it's about indian dancing and spongebob...i watched nickelodeon and its the months of spongebob's spongebash...presenting the new episodes of spongebob squarepants...sooo almost every day they just show this addverticement about this indian guy giving to an indian king a present and it was a yellow sponge...then they all started danciing at an indian style spongebob theme song...i mean..it's redicolous...seriously..if you watch it you're going to laugh maybe...well i did...oh well im not going to post much today coz there's just nothing happened...soo chao!

The 2nd vacation of the freakin' holiday...

hey again...i guess this is my second post of the day...there's seriously nothing to do..ok i did watched iCarly on TV just now...but i kinda missed a quarter of the show...and now i just cant get the feeling to watch 'true Jackson VP'. the show is funny...same as 'drake and josh'. after that i tried practicing alittle basketball outside and i was planning to ask my cousins and brother to play with me but unfortunately it was going to rain since i saw grey clouds overwhelming the freakin' blue sky...and thunder rumbled too..soo i decided to just do some free throws and layups alone...and do a couple of tricks...well obviously im not that good...i suck on tricks...but im still practicing my skills though....wait a minute...What the hell am i talking about here??? ahahahah...okok lets just get back to the topic for today...ok, let me inform you that 2 of my Australian cousins are coming this week...only i dint know when it is...but my dad planned to bring the whole family to A'Famosa in Melaka this Friday and my cousins are coming too...soo the trip is going to be my 2ND vacation of the whole holiday..coz i have at least 2 more weeks of vacation until school starts again...and soo I'm just trying my best to enjoy whatever is left in this freakishly boring holiday of my entire life...sooo...i guess i should just be...aaaaa....ok i forgot What i was going to say...oh well just forget it...cant wait to meet up with my friends again when school restarts...i miss them SO damn much...even though it hadn't been forever...but hey...I'm a weird-and-not-so-ordinary teenage girl am i???

The truth about the word 'studying'...

do you know that the word 'studying' actually derived from the words 'student' and 'dying'?? its true...i just found out about it a few days ago soo to those who already knew about it please...no comments....ahahah....it's was totally obvious...no wonder us students hate studying...ahahaha...i think most of you readers know about this thing...darn it...im soo left out of the history of modern speaking!!! oh well...wht to do....soo im sorry i didnt post for such a long time...i've been busy dying of boredom for the past several weeks of holiday...to be honest i really cant wait to o back to school...but there's a part of me that doesnt...coz you know....my school just sucks!!!...oh well i cant honestly do anything anyways...i got nothing to do today...soo i thought i should just update this bllog and watch lost tapes on youtube...im just freaking my brother and my cousin just by watching it...i tell you...seeing thier reaction to the vids is really funny! while i watched it with only a slight fear...that's all...well i know you guys thought im-not-scared-of-nothing kind of person...but im not perfect soo i sometimes get scared like other people....ahahah...im going to continue watching lost tapes now....ehehehee....time to witness my cousin and brother's reaction...

gettin' ready....

hey guys sorry i didnt post for soo long...i kinda got caught up with my guitar..i've been playing it everyday since the day i bought it...and now my fingers stings...ok first of the things i want to say is im torturingly nervous about today's tae kwon do exams...im going for the black belt today and to get it...i have to break an inch thick plank...YAOUZAAA!!!BUt i am confident that i could do it...all i have to do is to believe in myself...and i do...soo now im just hangin out infront of the tv...doing nothing...well i cant post much for now..i'll post again later...wish me luck guys!!! hasta lavista amigos!