me, X-box, best bud and a boy who just needs a play mate

hola amigos, Max here with her mind...im not doing anything right now so i just thought i would just post things here...the hell with the fact of necessity...WHO THE F*&# CARES RIGHT? anyways, school today was HORRIBLE...hear me? H.O.R.R.I.B.L.E...whY?

1. it was BORING

2. i regret not bringing my guitar

3.we did nothing

4.we got nothing to do

5. boredom was practically killing every kid in the freaking physics

i mean seriously...i never had been that regretful for a long time...But owh well...what happened after school was something at least...i came back with the normal soreness of sleeplessness from last night...i was planning to go online when my friend called me and invited me to her house...and why im excited about it? i get to play her FREAKING X-BOX! SERIOUSLY, i only played the X-box twice in my life...and yeah...i went there...

i hang out for a while..and played...she had a brother and he was playing HALO 3..i wanted to play that game...but oh well...i seems boring...so we ended up playing this game called "Split Second"...now when i say that game is addicting, i mean it...i couldn't help but win a few races...and then, i noticed something...

even though my friend's brother seem to enjoy himself for himself, he's just a boy who's lonely and had no play mates...i mean he was the only boy in his family and the only game freak....since i'm the big sister who is in charge of two little dweebs and just happens to be hardcore and love games as much as i love books, i know what he feels...so i guess (not to sound overly overrated) he had a great time playing with me...i mean, i think he hardly could enjoy a game with only himself to accompany him...and i enjoyed myself too...i'm looking forward to visit them again...

anyways...i feel like im writing too much and i ain't want to bored you guys half to death about me enjoying playing a game with some kid...well, all i want to do now is talk to my love, (you know it's you hero) and just enjoy my never ending nightmares tonight...PEACE OUT!

Want time? go steal it XD

Best Budds are your life

hola amigos...Max here coming to you with the unnecessary things in her mind...should i say today was cool? yes...for the first time after weeks i finally got the relaxation i needed...before it all went away...i went out with my friends today...even though there were only three of us, we sure had a great time together...after buying the tickets for the movie titled IN TIME, me, ainaa, and sof went to play 2 games of bowling...for once, i really feel like we should have warmed up a bit before we start playing...coz i noticed i was having finger cramps...oh well..

anyways, after that, we ate some lunch and watched the movie...to be honest there's not much going on in the story but it was interesting...i could say it was actually pretty cool...mostly it's about people of the future programmed to NOT age after 25...but you have to earn time if you ever want to live long...if you run out of time you die...ok to make things simple...in the movie, time was money....there...do the math...

after that we literally got nothing to do so we just went to the Tutti Fruity and ate some frozen yogurt...then we just hit the arcade...for the first time i didn't buy a book...NOT A SINGLE FREGGIN' BOOK...well, the book store had nothing to offer me so what the heck right? to be honest today was really relaxing...no thinking of stress...no thinking of problems...just me hangin' out with my to best budds and have fun...yeah....sometimes you just don't want these kind of days to past...but of course, time won't stop...we could only manage to steal the time as opportunities...

well, it'd be better if hero was there...but in a way...it was better he wasn't there (don't take this the wrong way hero. btw, i love you!). it was girl's day out anyway...right now, im just telling you this stuff so i could just get the ghetto out of me...im bored but hey...i had fun(i can say that again)...so right now i just want to say thank you Ainaa for joining me and sofiya today...it's been a long time since i saw you so it was nice to finally hang out with you budd ^__^ anyways...i can't write everything in my head out...too much stories to tell..but hey...at least i'll write you again sooner or later(hopefully)....well, i'll disappear...PEACE OUT!

Just go with it

IMAGINE THIS IS ME...-__-

Buenos noches amigos...Max returns with something unnecessary in her mind...like how much i wasn't enjoying today...heck yeah! why? 'cause it's a freaking WEEK OFF...anyways...other than lounging around watching Ghost Hunters and fattening myself out, i was....uhh...well...lounging around...there was seriously and honestly NOTHING IN THIS WHOLE FISH-MAGGOT UNIVERSE that i could possibly do unless its the usual routine of eating and sitting and destroying my eyes with the computer screen (it rhyms!XD) as you can obviously notice i changed the tittle of my blog...why? Cause i feel like the old one doesn't quite fit in my current life situation...so there you go...a reason...if you guys were ever wondering...

so anyways,i was going to post earlier today but somehow i got stuck on wtv i was planning to say...dunno if that were possible but hey, im a freggin' human...so i ended up just listening to music...and of course doing nothing...ok i dont know why that all i'm posting in this oh-so-boring blog of mine here is always about me trapped in boredom...you know why? b'cause, my fellow amigos out there who are frantically leaving this site, i can't take all the steam out of on a wall coz i will hurt myself and my boyfriend would go all parental on me ( out of the topic...i love you hero! even if you act like a freggin' dad. XD)

so anyways, my best budd sofiya and I are going out tomorrow to Wangsa Walk...oh just hangin' out and watch a movie and maybe play some bowling...i've invited another best budd of mine and hopefully she could come 'cause if not than it'll just be me and Sof...-__- which i am positive that you girls out there will definitely think it ain't gonna be fun...but oh well...at least i could get out of the house...

oh, and hero, if you're reading this, sorry i didn't invite you but its an all girls occasion...but at least we could hopefully see each other next week...(again...i just FREAKING love you) dang my lovey doveyness...oh well, i can't be here for long...i need to get some shut eye...since i need to get up in time if i ever want to go out with my best budds...well...PEACE OUT WORLD!

nothing to the best, the best to the nothing...

so for starters, i was hoping for a nice sleep last night...and yes i did have a nice sleep...thanx to the new mattress...i finished Maximum Ride's third book...which was cool...i wont say it was Epic...Epic are the books that would make me go crazy just to wait for the next book to be bought...like skulduggery pleasant for instance...whatever, now enough about books...as a normal teenager would do i woke up late today (heck who the hell doesn't) now here i am...just posting this nonsense like i always do...ok not always but still..just listening to my heroes (when their songs are all rock hard instead of now which is just plain soft for me to handle) Linkin Park...

im out of music to listen to...seriously...anyways, i have a field trip to go to next week...which i don't know if im that phsyc about it or not...honestly though i've been to the place for many times now but at least its with friends...that would be a first...update on my missing thumbdrive....still missing...oh well...im sure it's somewhere in my house...

and let me tell you one thing..boredom is one thing i hate...but watching my brother pathetically playing the PS2 is driving me crazy...seriously...even the game has no motif other than teaching kids swear words and be perverted...-__- but noooo....they still play the freaking game anyway... seriously world! create games that are less perverted for god sake and for the sake of our children's minds!! i mean c'mon...heads up people!! no wonder this world is full of violence...exposing kids to games like that...

oh what the hell, who am i kidding? i play games that are violent anyways...and watch movies that are f-ing violent...and full of swear words... so i take back my words...XD go knock yourselves out with those violence kids! XD okok dont listen to me coz im a lunatic...anyways...im going to write a chapter review of my story now...i'll catch you guys later... PEACE OUT!

Food, chocolate, cookies, soup...and still feel hungry

buenos noches amigos...the night angel is back..(i seriously have to stop calling myself that) just came back from having dinner at Wangsa Walk....and i ate sushi...SUSHI SASHIMI MAN! and ofcourse i ate the usual unagi and 2 salmon rolls....but even after that i still feel like i want to munch a bunch of burgers in one go...heesh...darn my eating appetite...when i and my family (mom,dad and the dweebs)went there,finally my brother had on something that was CASUAL on instead of looking like a freaking wannabe nerd for crying out loud...seriously...that boy really shouldn't look at Justin Bieber's fashion sense...

anyways, im currently full...kinda...i have a feeling i'd be searching for food afterwards...i wanted to buy another story book to get my mind on but apparently..mom asked me to wait...so since im raised to just agree..i agree...ok for some reason now im thinking of pastrami and tiramisu and chocolate dipped marshmallows...0__0 i cant be that into food right now am i??

either that or maybe its because of my weird appetite swings...sometimes im freaking hungry but only manage to eat so little...then i'd go hungry again and hunt for some decent food to munch on...ok..enough about food...i can say that im half pissed off coz i lost my freaking thumbdrive yet again for the gazillionth time...i seriously need to get my bearings...oh well...im gonna finish my novel...thank god that arif had a copy...woooo!!! peace out for now...(if i live through tonight)

BEAN BAGS! XD

hola guys! i wont say today was a pretty day...well that's a comment from a night angel like me...who mostly just always adored the night rather than the day...i can look out the window right now and just happen to see the surroundings kinda dark and gloomy as it always is at this time of the day...its going to rain...yet again...well typical weather here in my good old country...even if it rains at least it's not scorching hot like always...

now when i read what i wrote back on the first paragraph of this post...i just said 'always' 3 times...XD...anyways...i was just busy reading alone in my oh-so-private domain when a couple of guys came with the new MATTRESSES!! hurrraaaaay!! no more back pains that would make me feel like a 100 year old lady every time i wake up...owh and also...i got the BEAN BAG!! i've been wanting those things for the year! at first when i saw the red bean bag mom had bought i just asked her if i can get one in my room...damn did it shock me when she said the red one was MINE! i practically yelled 'yes' and howled like a werewolf up the stairs and stash my bean bag in my room...XD

i dont know why i howled exactly...it gave me a wierd feeling when i did...oh well...anyways...nothing had gone through last night...just a weird nightmare as usual...and a frequent pain at my ribs that's annoying me...oh well...COINCIDENCE is what i call it...yadayadayada...now if you wanted to know what went on yesterday well i just hung out at my best friends house...even if we didnt do anything that exciting other than just singing random lyrics that our minds come up with, i had a good time...at least i can see the hero that i loved...and yeah...im just louging on my new bed...doing nothing...which translate to trying not to finish my novel to soon...i mean seriously...i'm like half way through it in 3 hours...heeeeh 0_0

well im just going to stare at the world like a boss and then just shut my eyes...hoping i will be fighting like i always do....wtv im talking nonsense now... -__-

Parachute...

hey guys...Max here, coming back from the dead...i woke up early today which was actually a miracle for me...since im totally not that of a day person...i thought it was already 1pm in the afternoon...turns out its just 11am...which caught me by surprise...now i know you're wondering why i put a band's name for a title...well...i just wanna say that Parachute is now officially my favorite band.. i mean im like addicted with their song "kiss me slowly"...seriously...i cant stop listening to the freaking song...

i got the chords already...just need to fix Clarissa and i'll be on my way on mastering the song... their songs are so sweet to hear... i mean, as a guitarist (rookie), i've been trying to compose my own song..but failed every time...'cause i can't seem to get the melody right...though im trying...just need alittle help thats all...well...i have a dream to be a musician...but Dad wont let me be one...

to be honest i love music in every way...its when it just reflects on who you are every time you sing a song...at times you just express yourself when you write a song...plus...i love music as much as i love art...music IS a form of art am i right? its the matter of me saying 'if only...' every time i think of music...you can ask my hero about me with music...he'll answer your question with no doubt in either his voice or expression of his handsome face...

i remember every time i play my guitar i just love to hear the sound it makes...i sometimes look at the sky and just sang random words out loud... at times i got good lyrics out..but after i just forget them...oh well...but i keep on trying to finish up a song...hopefully i get to finish one...i almost did with one song...but i just cant get the melody...well...it doesn't mean im going to stop loving music just because i cant get a song running...well...i'd better get started...be back in a day... PEACE OUT! XD

Another day to waste

today i woke up with a tired feeling...mostly because i had a bad nightmare that shot me awake early in the morning...i mean seriously...who would not get creeped out by a toy car and a doll which looked like chucky in the movie the seed of chucky moving by itself and coming towards you...and trying to kill you...heeesh...after that i was alone at home since my parents were out picking my bro's from their football training...i did nothing but made myself a good high cholesterol cheese sandwich...

after that i just went online...and almost cried my eyes out when i heard the song 'forever and always' by the parachute...seriously...that was the most sad song i've EVER heard in my life...then just tried to write Night Angels ( my unfinished novel if you're wondering)...after that i just found out that a motoGP rider died in a collission here in this country's circuit...thats the first death recorded...Simoncelli was a great rider after Danny Padrosa and Rossi in my list...well...RIP Simoncelli...

well, where there's bad news, the good news came after that...THE ALL BLACKS BEAT FRENCH ASS!!! WOOOO! well i didn't get to watch the game since i have to babysit and be a lifeguard to my brothers at the club swimming pool...-__- oh well...as long as my All Blacks heroes won the battle for me...anyways...i am running out on things to say here so i'll just disappear for a minute...chao!!!

Sometimes,,,simple things just makes you smile...and at times,you just wish there's no such things as 'week-off's'

its time to stop thinking of misery...that thing is just nothing but a pesky little tiny bug that just bug your life...i dont think i made any sense...XD...all im trying to say is...every time misery bits you in the ass, its just the matter of you choosing to let it hurt or just ignore it...today was a pretty tiring day...woke up with a bad cramp at my legs...and ended up doing chores anyway... after that, there was a birthday party i had to attend which killed me in boredom...and what do you know? it's already 10.15pm....time goes soo fast when you're boring yourself out...

what i hate about holidays is when you just got nothing to do... when that happens you go all lazyass...and when that happens you get yelled at...and when THAT happens you just feel like committing suicide right on the spot...boredom is every freaking teenager's nemesis...sometimes i just don't understand when we were little kids, we use to jump all over the house because holidays is here...then we'll go loco...but now? heeeeeeesh.......that's all i could say...

now what i want to say regarding the title -- the first part of the title -- is that i just read my best friends blog a few minutes ago...Ainina...since i have no idea what to say to you other than thank you...i will personally compose a song for you...which i suspect will sound very bad (heck i don't even know if i could finish it) as a token of the great things you said...even if i don't really gotten use to people saying that (i seriously don't want to sound overrated)...but anyways...all i can say right now is that you're the best friend i've had this year...you're FREAKING awesome and cool...and i never met a friend like you (it rhymes! XD)...looking forward to take on the dead seas of a week-off...peace out!

ps: what i said might be nothing compared what you said about me...and again...you
are a spectaculawsome friend! ^__^

Conflicted....-__-

now i don't really know why i use that title for this one...ok to be honest...i can't believe im still meddling over my decision whether to bring Clarissa (my guitar) or not tomorrow...i've decided that i want to... with the encouragement from my beloved friends and my beloved hero...you know who...and they all wanted me to sing..with is somewhat my personal fear of humiliating myself...

today was ok...at least there was something for me and the other students to do something to kill the boredom...today, i(and friends) made a very-long-and-such-a-pain-in-the-ass-when-we're-making-it nation flag. it was kind fun...aside from the part when my knees and knuckles had to be treated with and ice-pack when i got home...we spent about 5 hours to finish up everything..believe me...when i say it's tiring...it is...imagine yourself feeling like and old lady/man with a back problem...that's what it feels like...

anyways...i wanted to ditch school sooo much...but then...mom wont let me...oh well..in a way...staying at school is way better than being at home where you could commit suicide because of boredom...unless you're a nerd who studies all the time...or if you're a numb-nut robot XD...if you're asking what i'm doing right now i'd say i'm doin' nothing but thinking of swiss chess and macaroni...and yes...im just freaking HUNGRY...-__-

When everything tries to bring you down...

hey amigos...i know...i know...first of all i like to welcome myself back from the dead pits of busyness in this Epic examination year...all that is over now...i did the best i can even when i feel i didn't really did it all out...oh well..i better not be thinking about it now...my parents ain't really helping me with the after effects of stress i had.. heck, im on my own... though it doesn't mean im not going to fight...but even when i told myself that about half a billion times i still feel like im falling...i don't really know if i could survive but i somehow am still standing after all that....i mean not without bullet holes in my chest that life shot at me with misery...but somehow....im still standing...

even after i hurt my knuckle's after punching the wall out of anger and frustration...or after i tortured myself by doing workouts until my legs were like jelly...i still stood up...though i have noooo idea how long i could last...most of my friends told me that sooner or later, i would eventually explode...and i honestly don't know what will happen...what i'll do...sometimes...i fell like it's better if im soulless and emotionless...

maybe it's an automatic response that i subconsciously fight for my life everyday...just barely getting through the night with nightmares i now can barely remember... people say im determined...i don't understand them at all...in fact, i don't understand why people call me brave, nice or even a great friend...i fell like a horrible person when they say that..im a hypocrite...self-centered...overrated...but they still say im good...

or maybe its because i don't believe in myself...i haven't got confidence...because i never get them...i never put confidence in my head...because i always do what people think is right..not what I think is right...i tried to make myself believe...but no...i couldn't...im always afraid of what people think...and you guys all think im such a brave person....heeesh...but right now, feeling like a branded traitor of a nation and exiled from the world...i find myself walking in my own path...and from the start...i know that path is never going to end unless i drop dead in the middle of it...i'll keep walking...and i'll fall...then...with my bleeding legs...i kept walking...